splitbeak (splitbeak) wrote,

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The New Musical Dictionary (and the jokes continue)

Adagio Formaggio: to play in a slow and cheesy manner.
AnDante: a musical composition that is infernally slow.
Angus Dei: to play with a divine, beefy tone.
A Patella: unaccompanied knee-slapping.
Appologgiatura: a composition, solo, or instrument you regret playing.
Approximatura: a series of notes played by a performer, not intended by the composer.
Approximento: a musical entrance that is somewhere in the vicinity of the correct pitch.
Bar Line: what musicians form after a concert.
Concerto Grossissimo: a really bad performance.
Coral Symphony: (see Beethoven-Caribbean period).
Cornetti Trombosis Disastrous: entanglement of brass instruments that can occur when musicians exit hastily down the stage stairs, usually to the bar line.
Dill Piccolino: a wind instrument that plays only sour notes.
Fermantra: a note that is held over and over and over....
Fermoota: a rest of indefinite length and dubious value.
Fog Hornoso: a sound that is heard when the conductor's intentions are not clear.
Gaul Blatter: a french horn player.
Kvetchendo: gradually getting annoyingly louder.
Mallade: a romantic song that's pretty aweful.
Molto bolto: head straight for the ending.
Opera buffa: musical stage production by nudists.
Spritzicato: plucking of a stringed instrument to produce a bright, bubbly sound, usually accompanied by sparkling water with lemon (wine optional).
Tempo Tantrumo: when a young band refuses to keep time with the conductor.
Tincanabulation: the annoying or irritating sounds made by extremely cheap bells.
Vesuvioso: a gradual buildup to a fiery conclusion.
Tags: laughs, music
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